Carbs of the Huge Manatee


You know, if politicians would quit talking this would be much more difficult. It's Expansion Pack #3. You've probably figured out how this works by now. Coming Soon!

Black Cards

  • “_______________ victims should make the best of a bad situation.” — Rick Santorum
  • I’d like to subject the members of the Westboro Baptist Church to ________________. Repeatedly.
  • It’s 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, ________________, it’s dark, and we’re wearing sunglasses. Hit it.
  • On Last Week Tonight with John Oliver, the main segment was a hard-hitting report on the dangers of _____________.
  • The latest miracle verified by the Vatican is a statue whose eyes bleed when in the presence of ________________.
  • The most awkward thing about ________________, is ______________.

White Cards

  • (½ * your age) + 7
  • Being not merely Pro-Choice, but actively Pro-Abortion.
  • Comedy shows doing better reporting than “real news.”
  • Inappropriately handling your ex-girlfriend’s underthings before returning them to her.
  • Listening to country music backwards.
  • Mexican food in Minnesota.
  • Psychiatrists Without Borders.
  • So-called “Nice Guys” and their entitlement issues.
  • Spaying and neutering irresponsible pet owners.
  • Stick figure porn.
  • The smell of sex.
  • Wearing hot, but incredibly painful, shoes.