Carbs of the Huge Manatee

WTF?

Dating in the 21st Century. Because ebola, global warming, the rise of the Tea Party, and Daesh weren't bad enough.

This expansion has been updated and now includes 22 black cards and 92 white cards.

Black Cards

  • Air, Friends/Family, iPhone, Good wine, Internet, ________________, and ________________. Yeah, that's seven, but I'm a rebel.
  • I'm looking for a partner in crime. The crime? ________________.
  • Must love Jesus and ________________.
  • People say that the first thing they notice about me is ________________, but it's actually ________________.
  • I deserve an Acadamy Award for not reacting when he started talking about ________________ 10 minutes into our first (and last) date.
  • Admit it. There's at least one person at this table you would really like to ________________.

White Cards

  • A date so awful you reevaluate your orientation.
  • Aging out of the online dating pool.
  • Being on a date where every question is answered with, "I'm not comfortable talking about that."
  • Checking out the hot one on the left then realizing that the profile is for the not-so-hot one on the right.
  • Contacting your cryptographer friend at the NSA for help in translating the poor grammar and spelling in a profile.
  • Deciding if the amazing sex is worth the amazing crazy.
  • Getting drunk. Not for the date, but just to search online.
  • Having sex with someone who learned from watching bad porn.
  • Realizing that this isn't a date, it's a chance for the person to share their love of Jesus with someone new.
  • Swiping left so hard you crack the screen.
  • Telling your parents that you met at church not on CollarSpace.com.
  • Thinking, "maybe I don't need protection... just this once" and afterwards finding out "yeah... I did."